Sight Problems

Wednesday mornings are so wonderful for me. I don't teach til 10 so I can actually sleep in til 6, have time to go running, eat breakfast and spend some time in the Word. This morning I was playing "I Am Bound" and "We Will Dance" on my guitar...trying to remind myself of Truth even when I don't feel it, and the words from 2 Cor 4 came to mind, filling me with hope... So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

The Father gently reminded me that this is temporary. It is momentary. And He is renewing me in my inner core day by day, even if it doesn't always feel like it. I realized this morning how much I'm looking to what is seen, but I need to change my focus and fix my gaze on the things that are invisible to my physical eyes and that can only be seen with the eyes of my heart. I want to see my life that way. And I want to see my students that way too.

I only had one class today and finished around 11:40. One of my goals has been to try to initiate eating lunch with my students on days that we finish right before the lunch break, but today I was feeling kind of down and was afraid to ask them to eat lunch with me (silly, I know). So I decided not to say anything and packed up my stuff feeling somewhat defeated and disappointed with myself for letting my fear of man keep me from just putting myself out there and having a chance to get to know them better. As I was doing this, I noticed some of my students in the back rearranging the tables and pulling out food which is something they haven't really done before. Then, one of my students called out, "Teacher, come have lunch with us. We brought our food today. Join us." They had brought food from home and were eager to have me share in their supply even though I had nothing to offer. So, I sat down with them - there was a group of about 8 students - and tried their homemade Lao food and just enjoyed chatting with them and getting to know them better.

Ironically, most of the students in that group were the ones I'd labeled the "attitude" crowd...They are the "in" group in the class, the "cool kids" and that label has stuck in my mind when I think of them. But after their kind gesture of inviting me to share their lunch, and just spending time getting to know them better, I realized how wrong I was about them. I had assigned a label, made my unofficial judgment of them, and wasn't viewing them through the eyes of the Father. In reality, they are just like all my other students, maybe just slightly more sure of themselves. But they made a real effort to get to know me today, and tell me about their lives as well. It's easy to assign a label when you view someone from a distance, but when you sit down and have a real conversation, their true heart begins to show.

The Father knew I needed to see what was previously unseen to me about these "cool kids" and He also knew I needed a lunch buddy today. And as usual, He gives more than we even ask for. He gave me 8 lunch buddies, a renewed perspective on my students and a sight realignment.

Of course, I will probably need another one tomorrow. But His grace is sufficient one day at a time.